Black in America

The verdict for the Zimmerman trial is in: not guilty. I am shocked and disappointed because I feel the justice system failed Trayvon Martin. I don't want to harbor hate in my heart for Zimmerman or any other White person, but it is hard. Someone wrote:
How can a justice system fail you, if it was not meant for you?
As a African American woman, I don't feel safe in my own country. YES, in the country where I pay my taxes and I am and law abiding citizen, I don't feel safe. At this moment, I feel that if someone wants to violate my rights, they can. I know to non-Black Americans, I may sound paranoid and a bit of a conspiracy theorist but the unsettling fact remains that being Black in the USA makes you a second rate citizen.
I detest writing that race and racism are still issues in 2013 but it is true. I don't really understand this judicial system or this country anymore. 

Customer Service

Customer service is an important aspect of the world we live in.
Last week, I received the worst service possible. My boyfriend and I were dining at Louie's Cafe. It's a small diner in a college community.  The food is good and affordable. On this particular occasion, my boyfriend, James, found an extremely long hair hiding in his sausage and cheese covered hashbrowns. The waitress took the plate and said ugh that's gross. She never apologized and she didnt try to compensate us for our ruined meal. I cannot and will not ever eat there again.
I work in fast food and I was embarrassed and angered by her lack of concern. I always treat customers with respect and I "go the extra mile". (That is how I got the nickname, Sunshine)
I just want to be treated the way I treat people.

Red Snapper

I went home (Georgia) this weekend, for Father's Day. Usually me and my sister end up arguing and (lol) true to form we argued. On the positive side, it was brief (usually these squabbles last days but this one was only minutes) but I still feel bad. My mom was in the car and she had so much anguish on her face. That look haunts me and I now I know I have to seek out anger management.

My sister gave me the nickname,"Red Snapper" because of my skin tone and my hot temper. It's a little funny but I'm more embarrassed that I can't control my anger.

So that's my newest endeavor into becoming a better person.

Where's Spongebob?

I don't have children but I am a child at heart. I still watch cartoons and I still wear hair bows. With that being said, where the H E L L is Spongebob?

Yes, he is missing from my Netflix queue. Upon further investigation, he will not be back. Big SIGH! This is the second show that has disappeared from my queue (The Biggest Loser was the first).

While I'm on the subject of Netflix, I don't feel like they are offering me everything that is available to be streamed. Yes, I majorly watch Frasier, Family Guy, American Dad, but I also watch Anime.

This may seem petty but I don't think I'm getting my $8.00 worth.

Stop recommending $hit to me and just put everything that can be streamed up there please.

Working Out

So at this moment, I weigh 270 pounds. Terrible, I know especially after getting down to 239 pounds. (Originally, I weighed 308 pounds) But I am accepting responsibility for eating my way back to the top.

My tasks are simple, do something physical everyday (this ranges from walking my dog, running, going to the gym) I just have to devote an hour to myself and my health.
So here's to Day 1... ready for the 6 mile walk

Taken for Granted

My boyfriend is a slob. His house is something that would easily make a 1 hour Hoarders special. So in the the 2 years we've been together, I can count on two hands how many times I've been to his house. When I do go, I bring bleach, pine-sol, and my own food. I am repulsed by him and his uncleanliness. He claims his brother is the culprit but my boyfriend's room tells another story. It's marred with dirty clothes on the floor and "occasional" dirty dishes.

But anyway, I don't live in the safest neighborhood (remember I was burglarize); however, my apartment is far from being in the "projects". I don't have the newest items in here but I try to keep it clean, especially with a dog. My boyfriend comes over and he is just as bad as her. He leaves whatever he uses (dishes, clothes, bottles,etc.) everywhere. I am really repulsed by him. The final straw is he "shit" in my toilet and did not flush. It happened before and he apologized. But this time, when I sent him a picture of the shit in question, he tried to justify it. There is no justification for nor flushing your own bodily fuctions. Sorry!

I work 8 hours starting 6 am (five days out of the week). I cook when I get home or when we come from the gym. He always has food to eat. And a clean place to sit. I don't remember the last time he said a simple thank you. I'm tired of being taken for granted.

What do you do to make a person know that their actions are upsetting you. I don't want to be a nag. But he is about to be cut-off.

Sleepless in the South

I'm listening to Emeli Sande’ song , Read all about it", and my heart is so heavy right now.

My best friend found out her husband has been cheating on her. And one of the 10 year olds my sister coached died in a car wreck. Attraction (dance group) performed a shadow dance that portrayed love and loss. One of my FB friends buried his cousin today.

None of these events didn't happen to me and I actually had a good day. But people these events might as well have happened to me, because I'm crying all the same.

I feel helpless because there is nothing I can do to fix this. Loss is inevitable and I can't cope. All I can do is pray:

Dear Lord,
I know that their bodies are gone but their spirits are with you, Lord,Please heal the hearts of those effected and affected by these losses. May they find all the comfort and support they need to get through these ordeals. Amen.

Let the healing begin.

Internet Thugs

On Facebook, today, a gentleman posted a picture and he was using urban vernacular (slang) and a lady responded with the following response:

"I hate the way southern people talk and right. It's girl instead of gurl. Nothing instead of ain't and what do you all think instead of what y'all think. DAM!!!!

Being from the South, born and raise, I was offended. So I responded:

"From a Southern POV (point of view) It is write instead of right and damn instead of dam. People should spell check before they correct someone."

The woman called me a jackass and became quite belligerent. I was amused. I didn't contribute to what could've been an ongoing Facebook feud. I simply wrote, "Usually when people resort to name calling, it shows signs of low intelligence. I refuse to have a war of words with an unarmed opponent. Have a nice day. : -)".

I find it amazing that people resort to lyrical violence for unnecessary reasons. She openly generalized a group of people and when someone corrected her she snapped. I've never been one to hide behind my words and I feel for someone to try and censor another individual is appalling and deplorable.

We all stereotype and generalize. But if someone calls us on these actions, we should face the consequences. People are so quick to get defensive and violent and it is not necessary. Listen before you act.

So to all you internet thugs... Calm Down! It is really unnecessary and it makes you look stupid and immature.
 

Still full...

Yesterday, I was so overcome with emotion because I recognized God's mercy. I'm not the most religious but I do profess my love and belief in Him (especially when moved by the spirit).

The past two weeks, since the burglarly, I haven't had fitful sleep or been comfortable in my apartment. I'm always scared that something bad will happen to me or my dog. My heart skips a beat because I'm scared the burglar (or even another thief) will  return.

When I talk to my mom, boyfriend,and sister, I say I'm okay but they don't know about the terror I feel or rather felt.

Yesterday while running, I finally gave this situation to God. I prayed to Him and I know all will be well. When I came home from running, I had the best sleep ever. It was not long but I feel like the weight of the world has been lifted from my shoulders. And for the safe return of my piece/peace of mind, I just want to say thank you Father.

There's not much else to say but Good Night

Punished @ 310 pm

Yesterday I did not finish my To-Do List; therefore I am punished: -(
I cannot watch TV or rest until my 17 tasks or done... Wish me luck.

It is now 835 pm and you can officially stick a fork in me... I'm done. I finished my list and now I am about to devour this salad. I'm proud of myself for my productivity today. I even did a six mile run ( my new best time of 1 hour and 36 minutes) not bad for a fat girl, right? Any who, before I eat I just want to say thank you God.

Thank you God for waking me up this morning. Thank you for my job and my health. Thank you for my friends, my mom, my dad, my sister, and my brother, my dog, my extended family and of course my boyfriend. Thank you for all the people who affect my life. I'm just humbled right now. Amen

Productivity (and the lack thereof)

Today is my off day and my goal was to clean my apartment and run some errands. I even wrote a To-Do List with 24 tasks on it. So far, I've only accomplished 6 tasks.

In my mind, I know I should be being productive; however, daytime court TV  is addictive. It started with divorce court, people's court, and now judge Mathis.

I can't break the trance. I watched so much court tv,  I feel like I passes the bar exam.

The burglary, the Wii, and Epic Mickey

I've been living in my apartment for 6 years now. I'm pretty quiet and I don't really mingle with my neighbors (only waves, smiles, and occasional chit chat). So I was quite dismayed when I came home from work and my gate and front door were unlocked and my home was ransacked. I was even more upset when I saw dust imprints where a Wii and Wii games once belonged. My dog was scared in the apartment and she made a whole bunch of number 1s and 2s all over. So it smelled awful and everything was everywhere.

I went through the proper channels. I called my landlord and the police but I still felt empty (not really for the loss of material possession but more so for my piece/peace of mind that was stolen).

I'm still trying to get that feeling of safety back. I did get another games system and I am really enjoying Epic Mickey. It's a really cute game and it's more interactive than I could have ever imagined. And also I can watch Netflix again. Frasier, here I come.

So the burglar may have taken my game system but still smiling on my end.

About Me

Name: Rhonda Bowman but my friends call me Sunshine

Age: 28 years young

No kids (but 1 high spirited beagle)

One twin sister and older brother

I love my dog, my boyfriend, my family, my friends, the color yellow, Netflix, The Wii, R&B music, running (I'm not a great runner, yet), 80s movies, chick flicks, cartoons, etc.

For anyone who reads this... My blog is a place for me to have a piece/peace of mind and occasionally blow some steam.

The subjects will vary and from time to time so will the language ($%&*# < see, I know some French)

So welcome all and enjoy your stay at adayinthelifeofrhondab